Shopping

Saturday is MY day because my boyfriend is always busy on a Saturday, during the summer he plays cricket or during the winter he will go and watch our local football team. This means that on a Saturday I spend the day doing all my jobs which includes tidying the house, food shopping etc. But because we went away at the weekend I didn't go shopping so by last night we had no food in the house so I went and did the shop last night and my boyfriend came too.

Now tomorrow I think I'm gonna have too much time on my hands as its not often that I stray away from Saturday plans. I may just have to go and have a nosey round town!

Going shopping with my boyfriend is quite funny because I enjoy food shopping more then I enjoy clothes shopping so on a Saturday I am known to probably spend about 1.5-2hrs in Asda at on a Saturday just browsing around the aisles, I have to go down every aisle to make sure I remember everything as we don't write a shopping list.

We don't normally go together as it causes arguments, he trys to rush me by rushing off with the trolley and get me round the aisles more quickly.

The issue is basically because I'm a bit like Monica from friends, I have a certain way of doing things. I like to go slow, remember all the stuff we need. I take stuff out the trolley on to the conveyor belt in a certain order so I can pack it up together. Like all the meats together, all the veg together etc. This makes it easy to unpack back home. My Boyfriend is so much more laid back and that's why we clash at Asda. Generally we have made a sensible decision not to go shopping together!!!

Was I right to do that?

Well I had the conversation with my friends about the drugs thing and then after I felt very upset about whether I had made the right decision to basically say that I didn't want to be around anymore when they were taking it.

As I said before, the issue isn't drugs but I what I was trying to do was to show love, because I really value our friendship and I don't feel that I'm doing that while being with them whilst their taking it.

I did start to think that its made me come across judgemental on them but that's not what I'm trying to do at all, its actually because I care about them so much. At this point I also read a blog by one of Brian's contacts called 'Brutal Beaters' where he writes about a girl who is no longer a christian and how people have been beaten and wounded by the church and its people. he talks about the story in the bible about the good Samaritan, how sometimes we actually represent the people that beat the man up rather then the Samaritan that helped out. I thought for minute is that me? Is that what I have done to my friends? was I right to do that? am I coming across as trying to hard to be righteous?

I have even tried to cut down on the fags to perhaps see how difficult it would be to give up something you enjoy. Not doing too bad actually, no fags before 6pm every day and then just a few at night.

But I have continued to mull this over and pray about it, then I read a blog from one of my mates Brian and he summed it up, thanks Brian. Also If your gonna check out his blog listen to the podcast about grace swaying her hips really liked this!

Open Door

I have recently been praying about a certain situation and I'm quiet apprehensive about it because it is something completely new to me and I have been praying that God will leave the door open to that situation if its right and will close the door if its not the path he wants me to take. I haven't heard anything for a week about this situation so I was thinking that the door had been closed but then last night during cell group we had a big prayer session and my mate had a prophetic vision of an open door with darkness behind it. she said she felt that the door was open but the darkness represented the unknown. Straight away I knew the vision was for me and it was God saying the door is open and he knows I'm a bit unsure but it will be OK and I need to trust in him.

During the evening I think alot of us have trust issues, find it difficult to leave things to God 100% but that passage came to me again

Proverbs Chp 3 V5

Trust in the Lord with all your heart;

do not depend on your own understanding.

I think we all really had good God experiences last night of him speaking into situations in our lives.

Alpha, Alpha, Alpha

Alpha national campaign starts in September so I am currently trying to tie up our own alpha promotion with that. I am presenting info about alpha at church on Sunday, email all church members to ask them to invite their friends and family to attend the course via an email invitation. Emailed members copies of the posters, explained how to add the alpha link to their own web pages etc. ITS STARTED. Still got loads to do, still need to plan the rest of the launch party, do further poster promotion and maybe even get the local pub to use the drinks mats.

Lots of work but anyone that knows me, knows I love the organising and the coming together of an event. Its great when you see the finished result and you know you helped make it be like that.

Meeting tonight with my cell group, no real structure to the night we just know that we all need some prayer at the moment so we are spend the evening doing that.

Bank Holiday Weekend

Nice weekend in Skegness, the weather stayed good for us the whole weekend. My mum had a nice birthday, took her out for a meal and brought her some of her favourite perfume.
I managed to get her on some of the fair rides that are at Fantasy Island, which was well funny cos she screamed all the way round and I laughed at her all the way round. Check out the photo of here!

We got home Monday afternoon and went and got a nice piece of Lamb so I did a big fat Roast dinner. Diet starts again today though so lets see how I get on.

Night in & Skegness this weekend

Well considering the weekend we had last weekend, I 'm staying in tonight. I am meeting up with my boyfriends sister for a bottle of wine and a Chinese. It will be nice to catch up with her as I haven't seen her properly in ages.

Then tomorrow we drive to skegness for a weekend at the seaside. Its my mummy's birthday so we thought we would spend the weekend with her and take her out for a nice meal and treat her to a lovely birthday!! Got to go shopping tomorrow to get her something not sure what yet though. Skegness is so cheesy (like most seaside resorts) but then its a break away from the norm so I quite enjoy it. The only downside is mum's caravan is parked there all the time so I have done most activities that are available in the area. (On the subject of my mum she has decided to do the Alpha course this term, so thats good news)

Failed

I failed!!!

Well I went home last night after not having a fag all day, where I would normally have had about 4 throughout the day at work. When I got home we had a bottle of wine between us and a nice pasta meal that my boyfriend had cooked and before you know it I had smoked a few fags.

I did well to smoke less then normal but after a glass of wine, the two things go hand in hand, wine-fags.

I'm going to try and not smoke as much as possible this week but I'm not going to beat my self up over it if I cant stick to it. Lately over the last few days I have drawn very close to God and I know the enemy will try his hardest to pull me away. He will pile on the guilt so that I will feel not worthy of God because I cant even commit to something as small as giving up fags. He has already attacked me relating to conversations at the pub the other night but I had dealt with that issue already so I'm not letting it effect me.

I will not let anything come between us. Lets face it, Yes maybe I cant give up the fags yet but I managed to give up the drink for 4 weeks!

Different views

Last night we had our cell at the pub for a social rather then at my house doing the normally bible study. we talked about different peoples views on what the bible says. I thought it was quite interesting what the back of the bible says that Brian Gave me. Leave it up to people to decide what they think now!!

We also discussed the fact that we are going to have to concentrate on Alpha planning etc and who we are going to pick as a team to be leaders and helpers this year. This link takes you to the alpha web site where it suggests how to make this desicion.
http://www.alphafriends.org/how-run-course#8

Next cell is at my house again and we have decided to dedicate the night to prayer, we will be praying for one another and also for potential alpha candidates as well.

Drugs

Why do people take Drugs?

I don't think I will ever understand it as I don't know how they make you feel but I know that I find it a real shame to watch people that are around me take them.

Going back to the blog where I wrote about the night we were away and everyone around me was taking drugs of some sort.

I have continued to pray about this and really struggling with it. It has also been more of an impact after helping that women as she was in the mess. she told us this was due to a combination of drink and drugs (she didn't say which drugs)

I have always thought that everyone is entitled to make their own decision and felt that as long as I didn't take them then that was ok. I also thought that if Jesus came to earth he would be in and amongst these sort of people and excepting them for what they were and what they did as the bible tells us he excepts everyone.


But as someone pointed out to me last night he may well come to earth and be amongst these people but he wouldn't sit back and watch them snort stuff up their nose or swallow a tablet around him.


Drugs has never been my thing, thankfully even when it has been around me (when I worked in Ibiza) I have not been tempted to venture in that direction. As I said it's never bothered me before that people around me doing it but suddenly in that moment in Plastik in Ibiza it was really a problem.

Its awful as well watching how it changes people, their facial expressions, their paranoid, they slurr, yet they still want more!!

Drugs seem to come between people and their relationship with God and honour is given to drugs not God. I have given up the fags as I mentioned in the last blog to draw closer to God and prevent the reliant I have on them coming between me and him.

Answered Pray

I was looking back over the last few weeks and the things that I have brought up such as my job and being closer to God.

I realise now that God is dealing with all the prayer that I have prayed recently.

I said that I needed to create more time for God and to be closer to him and over the weekend with all the things that went on, I feel drawn so much closer to God

Relating to my job, God is also dealing with that too. I have a few concerns with this one but I need to trust that if this is the right thing that God will leave the door open to it. I am fasting for a week, I've decided to give up fags for a week.

I have noticed the changes as well, about my feelings as I am feeling less discontent as I am more fulfilled with him.

Prayer really does change things, like my plaque says at home!!

I have also started to make a point of trying to read the prayer on sacred space most days which I have found very helpful. http://sacredspace.ie/

A friend of mine also gave me a CD of a guy called prophet Bill talking of things to come. It was a bit hard to get into cos he goes of on tangents but the overall message was to glorify God and anytime you think of doing negative, flip it over and say a positive. Eg if you are going to make a judgemental comment about someone, turn it round and praise them. This made me think, that maybe I don't do this enough so I'm gonna try and start.

Another Ibiza Story

I forgot to mention that I met up with Brian from 24/7 Prayer for a coffee, it was nice to put a name to a face (even though I have already seen his photo on his blog)

Just had a general chat about what they do out there, he showed me round the office and the prayer room and I thought back to when I was working out there and thought how nice it would have been to have somewhere like this to come to. It's a good thing for the guys that work in Ibiza at the moment.

He also gave me when of the goodie bags they give people, which contained a new testament written by Eugene Peterson called ' Jesus loves Porn Stars' a CD, pray request cards etc. The Bible is really good actually as it is a modern text and quite small so fits in my handbag fine. I started having a look through last night and enjoying it.

Forgot to even mention that I was interested in finding out a bit more about the 2 wks stints that they do. Never mind its not til next year anyway.

After leaving Brian it was when I got back to my hotel that I found that women on the beach.

Read all of 'writing on the wall' while I was away so I passed it on to Jackie the lady that helped me sort that other lady out. I hope it encourages Jackie even more with finding her faith again.

Long blog coming up!!!!

Well back from Ibiza after having a great time with the girls, there was a really lack of sleep on the holiday as people over there don't tend to go out til about 11pm which means your not in til about 5am/6am.

Had a big God moment whilst I was there. On my last day there was a women on the beach all curled up with her face down in the sad. It looked a bit like a yoga position or something but then the lads we met there went over and started taking the mick by going up behind her and pretending to have sex with her. This is when I realised something was wrong. I went over to see if she was ok as by know she had changed positions on to her side but her body looked very limp. When I got to her, her face was covered in sand and she had snot coming from her nose and she was crying. I could also tell that she was drunk as when I asked if she was alright she could hardly get a word out and I struggled to understand her. I sat there and thought, I've got to sort this out but didn't know how.
So at that moment I prayed and asked God to send me help or give me strength to deal with this and get the lady sorted out. Literally with in about 30 seconds a lady called Jackie came over and could see I may need some help. Between us we got the lady off the beach and sobered up for her flight home a few hours later. During this time I saw Jackie was wearing a cross so I asked her ' are you a christian?' and she said 'yes, are you?' and I said 'yes' and then it dawned on me that God had answered my prayer for help by sending Jackie who happened to be a christian also to sort the lady out. Once we got the lady in a taxi me and Jackie had a chat and she said she had lost her faith in the last year after loosing her cousin in a car crash and today has really opened her eyes (I told her about my answered pray for help). All this is great because I feel God used me to help the lady in need but also help someone come back to faith. How Exciting!! I told all my mates as well and they were quite surprised.

Also While I was there on the first night we wore T-shirts my friend had printed. They all said the normal stuff like Juicy Jo, Saucy Sarah etc except mine which said Econemical Emma which means someone who promotes Christianity. It was good because alot of people didn't know what it meant (including me) so they came over and asked, this stirred up alot of conversations with people asking me about my faith and what they thought. One guy said he did used to believe but cant now with the job he does as he works in a care home and sees alot of old people dying.
I said that we all die one day and instead of focusing on the death why not focus on the fact that these people may be going to heaven which makes the whole thing a more positive thought. I asked if I could pray for him but he didn't want me to (think he was a bit embarrassed) so I went and had a dance and prayed for him then on my own. Quite different praying in the middle of a night club but I figure God is still listening!

Then on the last day our flight was at 2am so we were planning on having an evening dinner and then getting a taxi to the airport. When we got back to the hotel the taxi's hadn't been booked and the hotel wouldn't book us one as they said they would all be busy so we had to just try and hail one down. but there was 8 of us girls and about 10 lads that we met all trying to get a taxi. Panic starting to set in with us all worrying whether we would manage to get one in time for our flight so again I prayed about it and told my friends not to panic cos I'd prayed and God would sort it. And sure enough he did, so again more answered prayer.

Ibiza Blog

Well here in Ibiza, and having a brill time with the girls. We went straight out on Friday night when we got here and I ended up staying up all night and then going straight to the pool. I did move on to water earlier on in the night though so I wasnt drunk just really enjoying the start of the holiday.

I had a sleep later in the day before we went out again on Saturday. We ventured to Plastik which is a bar near to Eden etc. I like the music in there and we all had a good dance.

Last night was our last night and we had planned to go to Eden for judgement Sunday but the plans did come off and we ended up staying in Plastik again. It was a good night but then I suddenly found myself by people taking drugs quitr liberally in front of me. If people wanna take drugs thats up to them but it is difficult to be on the same wave length as them if your just having a drink as your both enjoying a completely different experience to one another.

I was disappointed when some guy who was in our company decided to tell everyone that I had joined in with there narcotic antics, when I actually hadnt and dont ever intend to. I dont understand the whole drugs thing at all.

I will load on some photos when I get home for you all to have a look at.

Meeting up with Brian shortly from 24/7 so that should be good,

Message

Well as you know I previously wrote how I feel discontent and that I need to spend more time with God etc. Well last night our small group discussed this passage:

Ezekiel 47 1- 12

(I'm not gonna type out the whole passage but you can use the bible gateway link to view it if you like)

It talks about the river and as with most bible passages it has a meaning that makes sense from what you read but then a second meaning where God is trying to give us a message. In this its the river represents our relationship with God, how it starts as a small little trickle and then grows and grows. People and things all around us our nurtured also through the relationship we have with him. We had a prayer time afterwards to reflect on that and were asked to consider where we were on along the river and where did we want to be.

This is obviously really relevant to me as it is what I have been thinking, Where am I with God.
Anyway it was great cos I felt like God said:

'Come Deeper with me Emma, Don't be afraid'

How fantastic is that! so watch this space.

My friend also gave me a copy of Redmoon Rising which is a book written by Pete Greig from 24/7 prayer and I was debating on getting it for a while but I decided to buy Brian Heasley 'writing on the wall ' book first and I was gonna read that first but now I have both. Well actually Writing on the wall is on its way over from America, but I have redmoon rising now to take away with me.

24-7prayer

I go away tomorrow with the girlie's so I wont be Blogging for a while but will come back and keep you all updated about how much fun we had and may add a few photos.

Also the passage from previous blog wasn't the same one that came with my ring it was this

John 13 V13
34"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.

Which is something that I should consider more as sometimes I can be quite quick to Judge.

XX

Ibiza in 3 days

Well 3 days to Ibiza, Really looking forward to it now. The weather here is so rubbish and according to Brian's Weather Pixie on his blog the sun has got his hat on in Ibiza, Hip, hip , hip Hurray!

Think we are just gonna venture up the West end and then the Local clubs Es Paradise and Eden rather then the others purely to save money in taxi costs. Although I wouldn't have minded trying Hed Kandi at El Divino on Saturday.

As long as I can show my friend Sarah the sunset I dont mind where we go, I know she likes stuff like that ( like me!) it would be nicer to go beniras beach (not how you spell it) as its quieter there and allows you to reflect more. Although I do think that having so many people there you can still reflect but just in a completely different way.

Discontentment

This is a subject that was brought up at church the other day and I do really feel that it was applicable to me.

I have a lovely Boyfriend, house, car, nice clothes, good friends (now anyway) , good family, go on holiday once a year, have a job etc etc

Yet still I feel discontent with what I have. Why is this?

At church the other week we were all given a sticky label and asked to in our head write the word that was most relevant to us from the list we were looking at. I chose discontent as this was most relevant to me. Other words were things like lonely etc. Then asked to leave the sticky label on the door at church as we left to represent that we had left this with God to deal with in our lives. Now it has been highlighted though I keep think about it and how selfish I am that I'm not happy with all the lovely things God has provided me with.

I think its because I surround myself with materialistic things and don't consider whats really important and that is my faith and my relationship with God and how important Jesus is in my life. Which leads back to my previous blog about making more time God.

The verse that was read relating to this sermon was

John 10 7-11
7Therefore Jesus said again, "I tell you the truth, I am the gate for the sheep. 8All who ever came before me were thieves and robbers, but the sheep did not listen to them. 9I am the gate; whoever enters through me will be saved. He will come in and go out, and find pasture. 10The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. 11"I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep.

suggesting that through Jesus we should 'live life to the full' and that's what I'm gonna try and do.

Also the really great thing is that my boyfriend brought me a ring (not a wedding ring I might add) when I got baptised and it came with a piece of scripture, which at the time didn't seem to hold any relevance. But I'm sure that it is this passage, or if not relating to this topic!!
I will go home tonight and check and let you know.

Ibiza 2007

Only 4 days til I go Ibiza with the girls, Friday evening from Luton. We will be arriving into Ibiza early hours Saturday morning and will be going straight out.

My friend Jo has gone and got T-shirts printed, but wont tell me what they say so I'll have to wait and see on Friday. We will be arriving at the airport in these T-shirts and Cow girl hats!! Really Cheesy but that what all the fun is about.

I still haven't had a drink yet either since I gave it up the other week, so all in all it will have been about 4weeks. During this time I have been to a birthday night out, wedding, family BBQ, Meal out, Friends night in etc and still not been tempted.

I am going to try and find the guys from 24-7 out there while I'm there. Found out about them by coincidence last time I was there and now regularly read Brian's Blog http://www.brianheasley.blogspot.com/ and looking forward to saying Hi While I'm there.

Alpha

The Alpha Course is due to start up again at church on 3rd Oct. I have been involved in it every year since I went on it in 2001. Last few years I have been a 'helper' and have helped set up every Wednesday night. This year I have been given the job of planning the Launch party and also advertising the launch and advertising the course.

Anyone who is not sure what alpha is then check this site out http://www.alpha.org/ ( watch the factory download!!!)














This year we are trying to make it really different by having a Launch event with canapes and music of some sort. Normally we just have a sit down meal, which can be quite formal if you don't know people. So I am really excited that we are opting for a new and refreshing launch. I am currently in the process of getting all the info advertised in our church notices, magazine and website. Then I move on outside advertising like local post office(poster), local pubs (posters and Drink mats), Asda ( I'm thinking Chocolate bar and invite to Launch)

Want this year to be bursting at the seams with people who decided to come along. I think the promotional campaign is really good this year as well.

Gods Plans

I have always really like this passage:

Proverbs 3: 5

Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.

Because often I don't really get what Gods doing in my life. Its all about having trust in him that he knows what he is doing and he is sorting it.

Lately my job is not going to plan, I'm not enjoying it very much and worry were this leaves me. I don't want to leave the company as they are a really good company to work for and they believe from promoting with in, which is good.but don't really feel I'm in the right role. I tended to get like this lately after starting any new role. I get quite depressed about getting up to a job I don't enjoy, how nice would it be to be doing a job that you really love. I don't know that many people who could say they are doing a job they enjoy though. I have prayed about it and I'm just waiting for an answer at the mo.
But whilst sat at my desk wondering what I'm gonna do, I look at a mug which I'm drinking out of and its a mug my friend Gemma brought me for my baptism. It reads:

Jeremiah 29: 11

"For I know the plans I have for you" declares the Lord

Again there it is, so I figure I will just not worry about it as its in his hands.

Might be moving house soon as well which is exciting!!! more to come about this after the weekend.