Failed

I failed!!!

Well I went home last night after not having a fag all day, where I would normally have had about 4 throughout the day at work. When I got home we had a bottle of wine between us and a nice pasta meal that my boyfriend had cooked and before you know it I had smoked a few fags.

I did well to smoke less then normal but after a glass of wine, the two things go hand in hand, wine-fags.

I'm going to try and not smoke as much as possible this week but I'm not going to beat my self up over it if I cant stick to it. Lately over the last few days I have drawn very close to God and I know the enemy will try his hardest to pull me away. He will pile on the guilt so that I will feel not worthy of God because I cant even commit to something as small as giving up fags. He has already attacked me relating to conversations at the pub the other night but I had dealt with that issue already so I'm not letting it effect me.

I will not let anything come between us. Lets face it, Yes maybe I cant give up the fags yet but I managed to give up the drink for 4 weeks!